On the 4th Day of December, 2011

This afternoon the sky is a cloudless blue. The moon is making her debut ahead, the sun is shining down on my back. My fingers have missed these keys.

December 1st is always a bit of an odd day, after the intensity of November. Time is an elusive and mysterious mistress. As my favorite Doctor describes, ‎"People assume that time is a strict progression of cause to effect, but *actually* from a non-linear, non-subjective viewpoint - it's more like a big ball of wibbly wobbly... time-y wimey... stuff." 

On the first of December, time becomes a different thing for me. The hours line up before me with such potential, such possibility. I find, that having stretched time itself to its very limits in November, filling it with so very much, once the calendar rolls over, I am a bit lost. At once I feel the freedom of being able to do whatever I want, whenever I want. I can watch a movie. I can knit. I can stare out the window. I can go for a walk. I can have long conversations on the telephone. I can learn to play the ukulele (I cannot bring myself to spend the time to write out this last week's efforts to thwart my efforts to learn...but, seriously, it's getting to be downright frightening and/or ridiculous).

The one thing I have been unable to do, is to let go of my characters. 


It has taken all my willpower to keep the file closed, to give myself some time and space before returning to the work. But I cannot keep the story, the characters, from invading my mind. This morning a saw a ghost (so to speak) and all I could think of was how perfect it would be to use in the novel.


For the first time, I truly understand the story. I see it completely from beginning to end, start to finish. I know what it takes to get from point A to point B in a way that wasn't exactly clear to me a week ago. And my mind is racing to get back to the work to drop in some clues, to fill in some gaps, to undo some missteps, to finish. I have never ever ever ever wanted to edit so desperately. I need to finish this story. 


But for this minute, this moment, there are things that need to be accomplished and I have promised myself a full week away. Soon it will be a week.


My calendar is already marked for my beach getaway in January and I cannot wait to have that space, that time, and my ocean cheering me on.