Taking Time

November first. It's hard to believe the calendar has once again spun round to this date and yet, ready or not, here we are.

For me the past seven years the month of November has been defined not by the anniversary of my birth or Thanksgiving, but by National Novel Writing Month (otherwise known as NaNoWriMo). Every year that I have participated, I have come away a "winner," having written the required 50,000 words (and a grand total nearing 400,000!).

Each time I showed myself what pure magic transpires when you dedicate the time and space to stringing words together to tell a sustained story. These years of participation have taught me so many life altering lessons...about myself, my writing, about telling stories.

This year will be different. I will not be writing a novel this month.

I won't lie, there is a sadness that has intertwined itself with this decision and there were many moments when I asked myself, "Are you sure? I mean, are you really sure?"

But the answer I always fell back to was the same.

Not this year.

There are a handful of solid and rational whys, but the most important one has to do with the writing itself.

So while I won't be participating in the grand adventure that is NaNoWriMo, I will still be writing and working towards the goals I have set for myself.

I raise a glass to all of you who have taken on the challenge and wish you all the best. You're awesome and the world needs your story!

Godspeed, dear NaNoWriMos

A Brief Sort of Update

The last week has been a whirlwind of good, bad, and just about everything in between. One of those good things was "winning" NaNoWriMo 2015. As you might recollect, I started this year's endeavor promising myself I would simply try. If that didn't work out, I told told myself I could quit.

The good news is, I didn't. I wrote every day until the end and in the process created a delightfully complex and interesting character that I am sure I will come back to some day. Her name is Georgia and she was both fun and challenging to write for.

But the really good news is that I had loved doing the work. The other good news is that I re-instilled some necessary creative habits. I am going to do my damnedest to stick with them.

Halfway Point

At the beginning of the year I started using stickers as a way to motivate and document my writing days. It was an idea I'd adopted from Laini Taylor (see here). Let's say the last few months have had more blank spaces than Taylor Swift.

But not November.

November has been exactly what I needed it to be.

It has been the kick in the pants I needed to do the work, to reestablish routines.

It has been fun.

It has been surprising.

It has been challenging.

I have been inspired and delighted. 

25,230 words in and I am so happy. I look forward to sitting down each day to see how this story progresses, to see what my characters have in store, what twists and turns they'll take me on.

This story is very much about music and love songs and how they shape and define our ideas about love, from the time we are small children to the time we fall in love for real and for the first time. There is a soundtrack I've been building to slowly accompany these words and each day I look forward to seeing what song will find its way to my story.

So far.

To NaNo or Not To NaNo (that seems to be the question)

This past year my blogs have been few and far between. I've narrowed the cause to several likely culprits, some more serious than others. It's been a challenging year and one that has caused me to pause and focus inward, to withdraw from public view, to be quiet. Instead of sharing my life and my loves here, I've kicked it old school with a journal and the satisfying scratch of pen on paper. I've been writing selfishly, not publicly.

It's been a time filled with reading*, writing, traveling, listening to music. I've been to some amazing concerts and the happiest place on earth (Hogwarts, duh!). I've been inspired and challenged by some amazing writers. I've walked hundreds and hundreds and hundreds of miles. I've laughed to the point of tears and cried to the point where I felt hollow. It's been a year that has changed me.

Now, somehow, it is the very end of October with National Novel Writing Month (NaNoWriMo) visible on the horizon. Months and months ago I had grand plans to be at a different point in the editing process with the project I've been working on. I wanted to have this version done by the end of September so I could spend October planning what I would work on in November.

But then, life. And this time it wasn't a question of time. I had time. I had more of it in some ways than I had been expecting. What I didn't have was the mental and emotional space to do the work. After much internal debate, I decided to give myself a break.

A few people have asked me if I was planning to participate in NaNoWriMo this year. My answer has been, "Probably not." I have said things about how I don't want to start something new when I still have so much work on my current project. I've talked about how I don't want to make the same mistakes I've made before when it comes to the issues of Story and Plot. I've said that I will use this time to edit.

Probably.

What a wishy washy kind of word, lacking in conviction and commitment.

Last week, while I was writing in my journal and thinking about what it would be like not to participate in NaNoWriMo for the first time since I started (2009), I came across an idea. It's one that I've imagined before, a kind of experimental type of piece and the more I wrote about it the more excited I became and the more I thought that maybe participating would be the best thing for me and my writing, the best way to get me back into my daily habits of writing/editing.

I told myself to give it a week and see if the idea grew any roots.

I reminded myself of this Ben Folds inspired post I wrote in 2012 when I was debating the very same should I/shouldn't I question.

Seven days have passed and there hasn't been a day I haven't thought about this idea and all the ways it might be exactly the project my writing life needs.

Here is an unsolicited truth about me: I don't give myself permission to fail.

That truth has been a double edged sword my entire life. It's held me back just as much as it's pushed me forward.

What does it mean for NaNoWriMo? In the past it has meant that if I start, I can't quit halfway through. I'm either in or I'm out. If I sign up, I'm going to find a way to finish, to hit 50k no matter what.

This year, I think I'm going to do something different. I'm going to try. And if that turns out to be a mistake, I'm giving myself permission to fail.



*A list of a few favorites from this year include: Saint Anything by Sarah Dessen, Bone Gap by Laura Ruby, The Game of Love and Death by Martha Brockenbrough, The Wrath & the Dawn by Renee Ahdieh, George by Alex Gino, Where'd You Go Bernadette by Maria Semple, After You by Jojo Moyes (see this blog re: the first book), The Rest of Us Just Live Here by Patrick Ness, Illuminae by Amie Kaufman & Jay Kristoff, and Six of Crows by Leigh Bardugo. Yes, this list is YA heavy, but some of the most interesting story telling is definitely happening in this category.

Walking among the fallen.

Making Word(s) Count

Sunday mornings are my favorite writing time. The house is quiet. The coffee pressed. A fire dances behind its glass cage. The sun filters in through windows, brightening walls. My headphones are bringing me songs to make me think, to make me feel, to make me sway my head or tap my feet. Sunday mornings feel like they are made from time so full of potential.

28,514. 

That's how many words I've written in the first half of November. I'll be honest, not all of them have been easy. In fact, some of them have been pretty damn painful. But I've written every single day. Some days it's in the 500 range, others it's as high as 3,000. I usually build myself in 2-3 days of extra words so that if something comes up, I can take a day off without falling behind. I haven't had to do that yet. Taking a week off to write and run away to the Pacific was certainly a good choice. The last couple years my schedule didn't allow me that luxury.

It's amazing what you can do if you give yourself the time. November teaches me that lesson over and over again.

I know there are entire chapters written simply for word count. It's highly unlikely they will make the first round of edits as I start looking at words with a critical eye and I'm completely okay with that. I look at this month as more of a brainstorming/practice time. When it comes time to edit, that's when I'll dig through to see if there are any hidden gems. And the truth is, if the only new scene I keep is the one in which Holden figures out what Jezebel's name is, I'll be satisfied. This latest version is hands down a million times better than any other version I'd written before.

I have no idea what the rest of November holds for me. There will be more words. More surprises. More challenges. And I will welcome them all.

Sometimes the most important part of writing is walking.

Starting Over

There are so many reasons to love November. The extra hour, birthdays, Thanksgiving, the first chills of winter with their excuse to build a fire, NaNoWriMo.

I set out on my first NaNoWriMo journey five years ago yesterday. I had no idea what I was getting myself into at the time. I only knew that my writing life had stalled and I needed to do something to kick it in the ass.

It worked.

I wrote some 53,000 words. Some of them brilliant, some of them terrible, all of them worth it. That first manuscript is tucked in a filing cabinet and will likely never be revisited. It was an exercise. It served its purpose. It taught me I could do it. Maybe someday I'll dig it out and see if there's something in there worth mining for, but I doubt it.

The next year I started a very different kind of story, featuring two characters who came to me quite clearly, Holden and Jezebel.  They demanded their story be told.

I love them both so dearly, but I have struggled and struggled to get their story right. I know who they are. I know what they mean to each other. But how do I wrap that up in a strong plot? How do I tell their story?

I write and I write and I write about them and I study the craft of telling stories and every time I think I want to give up and lock their manuscript up in the filing cabinet with that first novel, I come to the same inevitable conclusion.

I can't.

In July I participated in Camp NaNoWriMo and other than a few chapters from Holden's point of view, I wrote the entire month about Jezebel's history, where she came from, how she got to be the way she is at the start of their story, about where her journey needs to take her.

I spent October taking a novel writing class and working through some of the issues of my manuscript. As each day passed and the start of November grew ever closer, I struggled to know what to do about NaNoWriMo.

Write something brand new? Take the month away from Holden and Jezebel?

Or keep telling their story. 

There are so many problems with the existing manuscript, the one that has evolved countless times over the last four years. I've often thought it would be easier to start over from scratch.

Yesterday, I did just that. I started over. I wrote three scenes containing 100% new words, 2,901 of them. There are some pretty big changes and there are some subtle nods to the original. The only thing that hasn't changed is the friendship between Holden and Jezebel.That will always be the core of both their stories. One can't exist without the other.

Today begins another writing day, one that I hope will be as productive as yesterday. I'm nestled into my favorite writing chair with a mug of coffee, a fire burning, an emotionally evocative soundtrack, and an extra hour of morning.

Summering

"It's no wonder that truth is stranger than fiction. Fiction has to make sense." Mark Twain

It's been so quiet around this blog that at night you can hear the crickets chirp. And I think that's okay. Crickets really are quite lovely and remind me of lovely things, like sleeping with the windows open, warm nights, swimming pools, the way the grass feels under bare feet. I'm a big fan of summer and this has been a great one.

June-->July-->August has been a lot about traveling and a lot about writing. I started in the Midwest, touring North Dakota, Minnesota, and a bit of Canada. More recently, I've been at the Oregon Coast and exploring more local haunts. I logged a lot of miles in the car, spent time visiting family and friends, and kicked off Camp NaNoWriMo.

I've been doing Na(tional)No(vel)Wri(ting)Mo(nth) every November since 2009 and have "won" every year. They started doing "Camp" a few times each spring/summer as a way to participate on a smaller scale and at a time that might be more convenient. I had a friend who was really interested in doing it and wanted someone to do it with so I agreed to sign up.

I have to say, it is A LOT harder to commit to that much writing time when the outside world is so very inviting and when you are doing so much traveling.

I gave a lot of thought to the project I wanted to work on. I've had a few story ideas percolating in the back of my mind, but the more and more I thought about it, the more I knew I needed to continue working on one I'd already begun.

So this summer was a return to the story of Jezebel & Holden, two characters who've been with me for the last four years, two characters whose story I've been struggling to get right.

A couple months ago I passed around some work-in-progress pages to a few critique partners for feedback. While it got me excited to rewrite in earnest, it also showed me that I was still struggling with some of the same background issues with Jezebel's character I'd always been fighting against. There were too many problems I still hadn't solved.

As July 1st approached, I realized what I needed to do, what I needed to work on more than anything else, was figuring out Jezebel's real story, what exactly happened to bring her to the where the story begins. I had to go back to move forward.

So I wrote 50,000+ new words in which I explored Jezebel's life Before. They were more a series of short stories where I asked myself a question about a particular event in her past and then wrote about it. Some of these were tough questions. Jezebel didn't have a particularly pleasant childhood.

I had some serious, major story breakthroughs that gave me some answers and some directions and a great deal of understanding I just didn't have before. I did also cheat and write a few of Holden's scenes and another scene from a character who is central to the story, but whose voice I'd never heard.

Camp NaNoWriMo, though it was painful (and at times exhausting) to sit myself down in a chair and write, proved to be exactly what I needed. I'm really grateful and glad I did it.

August has brought me back to editing and rewriting. I've been spending time rereading Wired for Story by Lisa Cron, asking myself some important questions as I try to finish this novel once and for all. It has been a slow, careful process. I'm getting a few new pages ready to send out for critique and am hopefully on a better track these days.

2014 Camp NaNoWriMo

50,000

This morning I have prepared all the necessary things. I have started a fire. I have brewed some french-pressed coffee. I have turned the heat on (because if I don't my fingers literally turn blue as I type). I have opened the curtains in the library so I can watch the sun filter in through the tree's bare branches. It is a perfect, lovely morning in so many ways.

I am thankful for this time I have to write.

Last night I crossed 50,000 words on this NaNoWriMo project. That's the minimum number of words required to "win." I wish I could say it was as exciting as it was when I hit that number for the first time in 2009, but it's not. 2009 was the first time I learned I could do it. I could string together a novel's length of words telling one story. That was a moment I hope to never forget.

While the thrill of crossing that line might not be as exhilarating as it first was, I feel just as proud. This month has not been an easy one. I gave up most of my personal life to be able to do NaNoWriMo this year and, as always, it was completely worth it. (Have I mentioned my husband is pretty fantastic?)

I'm far from done with this. I've mentioned before that the process I'm experimenting with to write this story means that I'm not writing it in chronological order. I have a lot of post-November work to do. It's as if I've cut out all the pieces to make a quilt, but still need to stitch them together into a beautiful pattern. I'm still learning how to do that and I am loving the challenge.

Today is my last "free" day, a day that is all mine, until the calendar rolls over into December (and then, it's December...). Today I will write the final scene. I've had a pretty solid idea of where the story will end up from the beginning. It will be interesting to see what happens when I actually try to translate the idea into words.

My Evening with Neil Gaiman (left) & Amanda Palmer (right) mug

Status Update

One week ago I left for a birthday/writing/vacation/adventure with my absolute favorite person in the world. (That would be the fantastic husband who takes excellent care of me during the month of November, along with every other month). It was heavenly. We arrived at Newport on one of the most beautiful days I have ever spent in Newport. 60's, sunshine, windless. We removed a few layers and went for a quick hike to the top of Salal Hill, which overlooks the Yaquina Head Outstanding Natural Area. We spent the rest of the afternoon on other coastal adventures, eating good food, walking along the Pacific, taking some deep breaths, and slowing down.

I couldn't have asked for a better time and place. I wrote thousands and thousands and thousands of words. I imagined (in my pre-trip ambitious mind) I would write more...but the weather, it was so very lovely and I could not resist the pull of the outdoors. But my story still progressed at a brisk pace. My characters became alive in new and interesting ways. They said and did things that made me feel proud of them and proud of myself.

In terms of NaNoWriMo, I arrived home way ahead of the game, ten full days ahead of schedule, which worked out well since I would need to spend time catching up on work and life chores. But it was totally and completely worth every minute of it.

I haven't written a word in two full days and now I simply can't put it off any longer. I've missed my characters, I've missed this project.

Devil's Punchbowl State Park

Where I wrote many, many, many words.

A Neil Gaiman reminder to myself.

Discovered on a walk.

It's Been One Week

The view from here.

One week and 15,299 words later, I have made it through the first bit of NaNoWriMo. There have been good days, better days, and one truly awful one. But no matter how I feel, no matter what I think I'd rather be doing, I have been sitting down and writing.

As I've mentioned before, this project (and the process) is considerably different than any other writing I have done. That is both quite satisfying and quite terrifying. One of the things that's really different is that I'm not writing the story chronologically. That's always been my process in the past. But this time, I have such a richer understanding of the characters, their motivations, and the plot points I'm trying to reach, that I can write the story in a much different way.

While jumping around can get a little tricky, especially when you're nearly 50 pages into a project, this has been a good challenge for me as I think about my Story, the story I'm trying to tell and how I'm telling it.

And all this plotting has in no way taken the joy I got from writing as a pantser. No matter how well I think I know the overall story arc, there is plenty left to discover as I travel from point to point. The Story has to be translated from ideas into actual type-able words. That's where the real joy comes from.

One of the things I love about NaNoWriMo is that my birthday falls exactly a week into it. I get to take the day off for writing (and other fun adventures) and I get to enjoy hearing kind words from friends and from family...and this year, I got some words that were especially meaningful and quite timely...for that I am more grateful than I can say.

In only two days I will retreat to the Oregon coast and wrap myself up in November and create as much of this story as I possibly can, knowing that when I return to reality, there will be a great many other demands on my time and my attention.

I'm very much looking forward to the time away.

With Two Days To Go

Last weekend I went away to the Oregon coast...one of the best places in the entire world. I ate amazing food, drank wine, slept, read, walked and wandered. I visited my favorite lighthouse, the Yaquina Head Lighthouse.* I wrote. I didn't get as much accomplished as I planned to, but I got done what was needed and balanced the time with conversation, laughter, and a roaring fire. I ignored all social media, turned my phone on "Do Not Disturb"...and it was heavenly.

At once I feel incredibly prepared for this year's NaNoWriMo and incredibly inadequate. This year's project is ambitious, to say the least, and I am constantly questioning whether or not I possess the talent to execute this vision. But the voice in my head keeps telling me that this is truly one of those stories that only I can tell...and therefore I must.

Today I hopped on the NaNoWriMo website to take care of updating my profile and to officially commit to participating in 2013 and they asked for a title and a cover...something I've never done (in advance) before. I had taken a picture while I was at the coast and after I'd texted it to a friend, he replied (knowing a thing or two about this project) "Book jacket art." So I spent 20 minutes this morning on my iPhone with a few apps and made up a cover. I didn't know if I'd be able to come up with a working title on the fly...but then...I did. And I like it. It's definitely a good place to start.

Two more days until the real writing begins...

My working cover art and title for NaNoWriMo 2013

*This lighthouse is an integral part of my 2013 story...something I began researching over 10 years ago.

Whispers of a Plot

When writing is good, when the story starts to stitch together, there is nothing better.  Last Sunday, I got to have one of those writing sessions that make it all worth it.

I've been trying to take a completely different approach to this year's NaNoWriMo. I want to be prepared. There is much discussion in the writing community about pantsers vs plotters. To date, I have been pretty much a pantser. And I love it. I really do love the thrill of writing to see what happens next, that moment when the story reveals itself in interesting and fascinating new ways.

NaNoWriMo taught me how to sit in the chair. And that was an absolutely priceless lesson.

But...

Over the past year I've been studying ideas of Story and Plot and I've read a book (Story Engineering by Larry Brooks) that is very much against the idea of pantsing. And I can definitely see his point.

You can do it anyway you like, but if you completely pants it, in the end, you end up with a lot more work and A LOT more editing...which is where I'm at with my last two NaNoWriMo projects. Every writer has to find their own process, their own unique way of working. There is no right way...there are easier ways, and more challenging ways. Ultimately, what I think I'll end up with, for myself, is a balance between the two. I will plot a skeleton and then pants the hell out of it.

For this year, I'd already come up with the general idea, the "story question" I want to answer. I started sketching out some of the main characters and exploring some of the main ideas a few months ago. And I've continued my reading about writing.

Recently there have been a lot of blog posts from agents, writers, and other assorted members of the literary community about NaNoWriMo and I've been enjoying their ideas and their insights. Through one of them, I stumbled upon one that referenced a book called The Plot Whisperer by Martha Alderson. When I checked it out (and purchased it) I also came across a companion book called The Plot Whisperer Book of Writing Prompts: Easy Exercises to Get You Writing.

I purchased that one as well and last Sunday I did the first prompt and came up with nearly 1700 words that gave me so many brilliant little insights into what November's story is actually going to be about. That one exercise, that single prompt to have my protagonist make a decision started so many thoughts and ideas that I spent the whole day thinking and plotting.

This year's project will be, by far, my most ambition and challenging project to day...and I don't think I've ever been more ready.

Research

8 Necessary Activities

The truth is, I just scrapped a really boring post I've spent the last 30 minutes working on. I was bored writing it, so I can't even imagine what it would have been like to read. It was about Wordstock this year and Wordstock last. And lovely time with lovely authors. And lovely weather and, in general, a whole lot of loveliness.

The truth is, right now I don't really feel like I have a lot to say. I feel as though my battery is completely drained. The screen is blank because the computer won't turn on.

Normally after an experience like Wordstock I'm completely energized and restless to get home and get to work. Maybe it was the sunshine that kept me from that feeling, those last 36 hours of warmth in the wind, sunshine settling into my pores, the overwhelming desire to simply breathe it all in. (And I did!)

The way I'm talking makes it sound like there's been no writing progress and when I reflect honestly, that simply isn't true. In my mind I've been simultaneously trying to figure out how to get back into the manuscript that is getting close to being finished and also plotting my 2013 NaNoWriMo project. And I really do think I'm making some progress on both fronts. I'm learning more and more background about these characters that are helping to inform the whys and the whats.

21 more days until November 1st...

No matter what I do, I just can't seem to escape the ever present sound of time passing.

I think it's time to make a list (in no particular order) of all the things I can do to recharge before it's too late.

1) Sleep (more than 6 hours a night)
2) Spend time laughing with the people I love
3) Listen, really listen, to music
4) Take my favorite pen to a quality sheet of paper
5) Crunch some fall leaves with my feet
6) Listen to the sound of the ocean's waves crashing against the sand
7) Reread a favorite book
8) Go see live music

I am now making it my personal mission to accomplish all 8 things over the course of the next 21 days.


I can't say for sure that it will help, but it definitely can't hurt.

Time is a Piece of Wax

I honestly can't remember the last time I sat in this chair with a cup of coffee and a sunny breeze. There is a part of me that can't believe the calendar reads "September" and there is a part of me that is grateful for its arrival. I love the beginning of every season and while Summer and I have had an epic love affair I will never forget, there is a part of me that is ready to fall head over heels into Fall.

Life has been...busy? Full? Chaotic? Calm? Yes and yes and yes and yes. It has been all those things  and if I'm lucky enough to get my secret heart's desire it will be all that and exponentially more. But what is constant if not change?

I've been finding more and more that time is elastic. It bends, it expands, it shrinks. As the Doctor says, "People assume that time is a strict progression of cause to effect, but actually, from a non-linear non-subjective viewpoint, it's more like a big bowl of wibbly wobbly timey wimey... stuff."

I want to take that bowl and mix up something delicious.

Perhaps one of the greatest lessons that NaNoWriMo taught me was that there is always time for the things you want to do. It is that knowledge that has kept me sane during the last few weeks of long work days and long work weeks. It's why I find myself, feet bathing in the morning sunshine, cozied up in my favorite chair with a cup of coffee, contemplating all the promises time has to offer. 

I don't want to wake up in five, ten, twenty, or thirty years dreaming about the things that might have been. I don't to wake up bitter or with regret. I'd rather live a life filled with fantastic mistakes.

Too Many Trees in the Forest (Too Many Places to Hide)

Last Sunday, I was supposed to really dig into the revising of the manuscript I've been working on for a little over two years now. And I tried. I did.

But if I'm completely honest with myself, I'm feeling lost. Lost and maybe a bit overwhelmed. I can't see the forest for the trees or the trees for the enormity of the forest. So instead of digging my heals in and getting to the tough work of editing the words that are so close to my heart, I cheated.

I'm not sure how it happened, but my fingers slid and clicked their way to the document on the screen titled simply "NaNoWriMo2012," a document I hadn't once felt tempted to open since completing my 50,000 some words during the last days of November. I can't even say what I expected would happen when I opened the file, but before I even realized what I was doing, I was reading. I was reading words that I had written, for the first time ever.

And they weren't so bad.

Before I knew it, I'd read the first twenty pages, fixing a few typos, adding and deleting the occasional sentence. And I was enjoying the story. Reading about Henry felt a bit like catching up with an old friend. Sometimes I found it hard to believe they were my words and my ideas (and a few times I was embarrassed that they were my words and my ideas).

Since then, I've been picking away at NaNoWriMo2012, reading a chapter here and a chapter there, continuing my procrastination of the work I know I should be doing. I feel less guilty than if I wasn't editing at all, but I still feel guilty. It doesn't help that Henry is a character with a certain vulnerability and charm that just draws me in...which is probably why I wrote a book about him in the first place.

The truth is, I think there is a part of me that doesn't want to ever finish Something Worth Holding On To because when I finish it, I have to send it out into the world to see what happens, for better or for worse. Right now it's in a safe little space. A few people have read versions of it and pieces of it, but I'm the only one who knows where the story stands. I've discovered there is a shield that comes with a "Work In Progress" that protects your pride and right now I'm a little too comfortable there.

Finishing NaNoWriMo with Laini Taylor and Joss Whedon

It is now officially December which means that NaNoWriMo 2012 is over. It's always a bit of a strange transition, rushing from the "I Must Write Every Day" mentality to the "It's Absolute Holiday Chaos!" mentality. This was, without any doubts, the hardest NaNoWriMo of the four that I have participated in, but I knew that would be the case going in. I barely managed to creep across the 50,000 word finish line. But I did. I did it anyway!

It's way too early to tell if Henry's story will become anything worth pursuing. And ultimately, I don't care right now. I'm so proud that I managed write it in the first place. Despite long work hours. Despite illness. Despite time spent with family and friends and a husband and a dog. Despite more days "off" from NaNoWriMo than I've ever taken, I did it. For that, I am proud enough.

There have been a few things that have been percolating in my head for past week or two. Around Twitter and quite possibly Facebook as well, Joss Whedon's Writing Tips have been circulating. I've probably seen them shared around a dozen times. Joss Whedon's first rule of writing is "Finish It."

He says, "Actually finishing it is what I’m gonna put in as step one. You may laugh at this, but it’s true. I have so many friends who have written two-thirds of a screenplay, and then re-written it for about three years. Finishing a screenplay is first of all truly difficult, and secondly really liberating. Even if it’s not perfect, even if you know you’re gonna have to go back into it, type to the end. You have to have a little closure."

The first thing I thought about after reading this was, "That is exactly what NaNoWriMo taught me. For years I would start a story, write a page or two or a dozen or two dozen, and then I would quit. It would get hard, I would get bored, I would quit. NaNoWriMo taught me how to plow forward to the end and get the story down.  You can read the rest of Joss Whedon's writing tips here.

This past week I got to spend time with Laini Taylor. Her publisher scheduled an event with my store on Tuesday and several weeks ago we found out that they were also hoping we could arrange a school visit for her. I thought immediately of a friend from high school who is now a high school librarian and called her to see if she wanted to do it...I had recently gotten her to read Daughter of Smoke and Bone and knew she had loved it. She did an amazing job of getting the event organized for her school and I was thrilled to get to tag along (even though I was quite sick). Laini Taylor is a smart, clever, thoughtful writer with an inspired imagination. Daughter of Smoke and Bone and Days of Blood and Starlight are two of my favorites from what I've read in the last year.

One of the things that Laini Taylor said about writing, both at the school and at the store event, was how important it is to finish. She talked about her struggles with perfectionism and how she'd wanted to be a writer since she was a kid. She talked about how this perfectionism and the desire to tinker with the first paragraph to the first chapter kept her from ever finishing anything. It wasn't until she was 35 that she finished writing her first novel. I could 100% relate.

When I was in 4th grade I filled notebook after college ruled notebook with a story about a human girl (very likely myself) who wandered into a magical land and met these remarkable creatures and had adventure after adventure with them. I wish so desperately that I still had these notebooks or could at least remember the name for these creatures. Since that time I have always wanted to be a writer. It just took me twenty more years to figure out what kind of writer I truly wanted to be.

I had recently turned 34 when I finally finished my first novel and the only reason I was able to do it was because of NaNoWriMo. It taught me how to finish. It got me back into a (mostly) daily writing habit. It inspired me to go back and edit, to put in the time and the work to make my story even better.

Because of NaNoWriMo I now have a manuscript that began in 2010 that I want to see published. I have the passion and the persistence to edit and revise and to make Holden and Jezebel's story into something the world can read. And it's almost there, thanks to some excellent critique advice I've been given over the past two years.

This is why I now participate in NaNoWriMo. This is why I donate money to NaNoWriMo every year. 

Laini Taylor at Reynolds High School, Oregon

Favorite words from Laini's journal as she began Daughter of Smoke and Bone

Signing books for students

Signing books at Barnes & Noble with Clementine who was drawing "books" for fans and giving them away. It was quite possibly the Cutest Thing Ever.

The Final Week

Yesterday I ditched writing because of:
a) Work
b) Finally getting to see The Perks of Being a Wallflower
c) The chance to play Cards Against Humanity
d) All of the Above

The answer is ''d."

Because of those three reasons, and the Black Friday that was the day before, I fell a tiny bit behind when I had previously been about a day ahead. So today I cleared my calendar for today and planned for some major words to be written and despite having gone to bed much later than the current typical, I was still up at 5:30 a.m. By 9:00 a.m. I'd written nearly 3,000 new words.

I took a break and finally finished reading Days of Blood and Starlight (brilliant!). I did some laundry and rewarded myself by watching an episode of Alias on Netflix (hello Sark!). Then I settled in for another writing session and 2,000 more words arrived.

By this point in the afternoon the sun was shining and I took that as my cue to get outside for a long walk. And walk I did, listening to some Neko Case and watching the birds fly through the blue sky. It was perfect and exactly what my day had been needing.

I'm nearing the finale of this fiction and am pretty sure I can see how Henry's story is going to wrap up. After my walk I came home to have a drink and write at least 1,000 more words for the day. Which I did. This has been my most prolific writing day of NaNoWriMo 2012!

This book is very different from anything else I've attempted before and yet I think at it's heart it is also very much like everything else I've written. It's not so different in that it wouldn't be recognized as mine. I have a much better sense now about what this story is about than I did at the beginning and there are some definite things I need to change for some continuity purposes and also because I made some wiser choices regarding the plot and the characters.

I definitely don't have the same passion for this project as I have for my other work-in-progress. I've been thinking a lot about why and I wonder if it's simply because I have yet to put the other project to bed.

So it haunts me and calls me back. I have truly missed Holden and Jezebel and their world.

The time away has been essential for us. And maybe once I've had some time away from this work (I have no idea at all what I'd title this novel if held at gunpoint...thank goodness people don't hold writers at gunpoint demanding novel titles!) I'll have a greater passion for seeing it through the entire editing process from roughest draft to polished manuscript.

Right now, there are only five more days in November and I have a clear end in sight for this story. It may change in a month, in a year, in ten years, but I have a goal I'm working towards and right now that's all that matters.

I'm also still in denial that December will join us by the end of the week...even though my Doctor Who Christmas ornaments have arrived.

For several blocks pieces of this paperback could be found on my afternoon walk.

Life on Day 18

This weekend has been the last deep breath before the holidays officially begin. It's been a time to catch up on sleep, catch up with friends, catch up on my word count. I wasn't kidding earlier when I said that if this NaNoWriMo didn't kill me it was going to make me feel like I could do anything. If I can finish a novel in November of 2012, I will never have another excuse for not writing.

And here I am, ready to round the corner into 30,000 words. I have new characters that I'm really starting to care about. (Confession: there was a point last week where I missed my old characters so much I actually thought about cheating and writing another scene just for them...it's been harder to let them go than I ever would have thought.)

There have been more days when I've wanted to do anything else, days that I have been so tired the last thing I've wanted to do is sit down with my laptop and make my brain work some more. But I've done it and words have come out and a story is being shaped and the truth is, the writing does make me happier.

Today I will meet lovely friends for breakfast. Later I will write while the laundry is laundered. I will take a nap if I feel it. I will read a book because I want to. I am currently reading Laini Taylor's Days of Blood and Starlight because she is a brilliant writer and because she'll be doing an author visit at my friend's school and an event at my store next week...and if there's one book I get to read this November, this one's going to be it.

A Full Heart and a Full Bar

This past week was my birthday.

It was also one of the craziest weeks ever.

No really, ever.

I will save you the sordid details of all the things that went right, and also what went terribly wrong. I will tell you that I got paid a lovely compliment (or two) by someone rather important in my working world and that I finished my birthday evening (after I'd already gone to bed), by responding to a burglar alarm at work.

With all the things that happened this week, the good and the bad, I am astonished to wake up this morning and find my word count is exactly where it needs to be. Because of the chaos, I have taken two of the first ten days off of NaNoWriMo. I usually allow myself three per month, though I've never actually used all three.

When I've had the time to write, the words have been coming and for that I have been grateful. Last night I had a great two hour writing window in which I highly amused myself by coming up with what (I think) is a rather witty, clever scene with some hilarious dialogue. I was so grateful my husband was home so I could talk to someone about it! Those moments in writing are always my favorite, those ones where you slowly build up to something that absolutely works for the scene/character.

Last night a few friends came over to celebrate birthdayness and play Cards Against Humanity (which has to be the best, most awful game...seriously, there were so many tears of laughter my abs hurt today!). They brought with them generous birthday gifts, including an army of bottles to restock my bar.  The evening of laughter, food, drink, and the best company, was the perfect way to relax after the last several weeks. I'm grateful to have such wonderful people in my life.

And I'm really looking forward to playing Cards Against Humanity again.

The 4th Day of NaNoWriMo 2012

I just wanted to check in and let you know how things are going.

In all honesty, the hardest part has been finding the time to write. After a super long day at work yesterday I decided to take the night off, go out to dinner with my husband, take care of the grocery shopping and a few other work-related projects so that Sunday I could have a more restful and productive day off.

It has been all kinds of wonderful. I needed to write 3,000 words just to catch up. I managed 4,000 which means I'm now a tiny bit ahead of the game.

This should be my last under-staffed week at work and thanks to a very kind, generous, and supportive soul, it's not going to be nearly as bad as it could have been.

I am enjoying every minute I've spent writing and have found that it has decreased the stress from my life instead of adding to it.

So glad I decided to "Do It Anyway." Henry is proving to be an excellent protagonist and I think the trouble he gets himself into is going to be fun for me to write about.

That kind of Sunday. Tater Tot Hotdish and red wine.